Christopher Liew: How to talk to your aging parents about money before it’s too late

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Christopher Liew is a CFP®, CFA Charterholder and former financial advisor. He writes personal finance tips for thousands of daily Canadian readers at Blueprint Financial.

Nobody loves this conversation. Asking your parents about their will, their bank accounts, or what they want in their final years can feel morbid or just plain awkward. I’ve had clients put it off for a decade, only to scramble through a filing cabinet at 2 a.m. after a stroke or a fall.

But the conversation is almost always easier than we expect, and the cost of avoiding it is almost always higher than we imagine. Below, I’ll walk through how to start the money talk with aging parents and what to cover.

Why this talk matters more than ever

Canada is in the middle of its largest-ever wealth transfer. According to TD Asset Management, over $1 trillion is expected to move from baby boomers to their millennial and Gen Z heirs over the next two decades, with a significant chunk shifting in the next few years.

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At the same time, Statistics Canada now counts more than 8 million Canadians aged 65 and older, about 19.5 per cent of the population as of July 2025. The demographic wave isn’t coming. It’s here.

And yet most families are flying blind. A 2025 Willful survey found that 41 per cent of Canadians polled had never had a detailed conversation with their family about end-of-life wishes. A separate Scotiatrust analysis of affluent Canadians over 50 found that 41 per cent lacked a power of attorney for finances, and 47 per cent lacked one for medical care.

Those are the gaps that turn a difficult life event into a legal and financial mess.

1. Start with a soft opening, not a sit-down

Do not schedule a “family meeting.” That is how to make your parents shut down. I used to think scheduling one was the responsible move, until I watched it backfire in three different families.

Instead, piggyback on something already in the news, in a movie, or in your own life. Something like, “Mom, I was reading about this wealth transfer thing, and it got me thinking. I don’t actually know if you and Dad have a will. Can we talk about it sometime?” Much easier than an ambush over Sunday dinner.

The goal of the first conversation is not to get answers. It is to get agreement that these conversations will happen. Think of it as opening a file, not filling it in.

To get a sense of just how high the stakes are, I broke down why this moment is so pivotal for Canadian families in a Blueprint Financial video on the retirement crisis in Canada.

2. Cover the three documents every parent should have

If your parents get nothing else done, they need these three:

• a will that reflects their current wishes;
• a power of attorney for property or finances, so someone can pay their bills and manage investments if they cannot; and
• a power of attorney for personal care, so someone can make medical decisions if they are incapacitated (in Quebec, a single protection mandate covers both).

Without a will, the province decides who gets what using a rigid formula that may have nothing to do with what your parents wanted. Without a financial POA, the family may need to apply for guardianship through the courts, which is slow, expensive and stressful. Not every family needs a lawyer to get this done, but most will at least want legal eyes on it.

The good news is that this does not have to be a five-figure project. Recent industry data pegs a simple will in Canada at around $600 on average, with a full package including powers of attorney closer to $950. For most families, it’s money well spent.

3. Find out where everything actually lives

A will is useless if nobody can find the accounts. This is where I see families fall apart most often. The documents exist somewhere, but the person who knew the passwords and the filing system is gone or no longer able to explain it.

Sit down with your parents and build a simple inventory together. It should include:

• bank accounts, investment accounts, and the institutions that hold them;
• RRSPs, RRIFs, TFSAs, and pensions, including designated beneficiaries;
• real estate, including any second properties or cottages;
• life insurance policies and the issuing companies;
• debts, credit cards, and lines of credit;
• digital accounts: email, password managers, cloud storage; and
• their accountant, lawyer, and financial planner.

This is also the right time to talk about debts. Children are usually not personally responsible, but debts can still eat into the estate before anyone inherits a thing.

4. Talk about the future they actually want

Money is only half of this. The other half is lifestyle. The same Scotiatrust research found that 77 per cent of those affluent Canadians over 50 want to age in their own homes, yet 43 per cent have not discussed aging in place with their children. That is a recipe for rushed, emotional decisions during a crisis.

Ask the questions your parents are probably already thinking about. Do they want to stay in the family home as long as possible? Are they open to downsizing? What does their ideal care situation look like if they need help with daily activities? Who do they want making decisions for them?

You do not need every answer in one sitting. You just need to know these preferences exist and have been voiced out loud.

Final thoughts

Talking to aging parents about money is not a single conversation. It is a series of small, imperfect ones that get easier the more you have them. Done well, this is not a morbid exercise. It is one of the most loving things you can do for them, and for yourself.

Read more from Christopher Liew:

• Here are some of the most surprising tax claims that are absolutely legitimate
• What happens if you miss the tax deadline in Canada?
• Consistently large refunds could be signal your tax strategy needs work
• The biggest tax and benefit changes for 2026 you shouldn’t be sleeping on
• Here are 5 tax credits and deductions Canadians are missing out on